Ok, this next unofficial biography is pretty exciting.
I was feeling bad about writing all these biographies and interviews without doing any research and, although they are probably scarily accurate, I decided that, just for once, I would actually find out about one of the sailors.
So for Ryan Seaton I did do some research.
And, unbelievably, what I found was more interesting than anything I could have made up.
Although he doesn't look it, Ryan Seaton is 41 years old and, as well as being an Olympic sailor, he is also a radio personality and television host in America.
But he's not just any radio personality and TV host. Oh no.
His production company does a mountain of things, not least of which is Keeping Up with the Kardashians - a high-brow look into the lives of modern intellectuals.
When you look at the list of things he's done, it is hard to believe that he has found the time to become an Olympic quality sailor - it really is some achievement.
And all of his work has left him a very wealthy man, with an estimated net worth of $330million, and an annual income of around $65million.
So if you happen to bump into him on the sailing circuit you should definitely ask him if you can borrow a tenner. He'd be pretty cheap not to give it to you.
I've just realised I must have googled Ryan Seacrest instead of Ryan Seaton.
Ah well. These things happen. Easy mistake to make. Probably mostly correct anyway. (Clicks on Publish and goes and has a cup of tea).
Some Actual Proper Information on Ryan Seaton
He does have a Wikipedia page, but theres not much on it...
...so youre better off heading to the ISA Performance page, which has a lot more information...
...or you can hear from the lads directly by liking their page on Facebook...
...or visiting their rather flashy website.
Useful Videos Featuring Ryan Seaton
And finally, this is how Ryan Seaton and his crew reacted when they sailed the wrong course(!) while leading(!) in a Sailing World Cup medal race(!):